The Origin of Hurricanes

He looked down glumly. Well, maybe not exactly down, since there really wasn't any" down" yet. In fact, there wasn't anything yet. At least not anything that you and I would recognize as a thing.

Then He looked around. (Same idea.) What to do? Something. Because he had enough, much much more than enough, of nothing.

But what? We could suppose that being the only creative entity in existence might have its perks. But whatever they were, variety and excitement were not among them.

He might not have even understood himself in terms of a "creative entity." But that "day" (one of many anachronisms to follow, since "day "as either a phenomenon or a word did not exist yet), the vague notion of a creation did enter His consciousness.

So once the idea of the creation occurred to Him, the rest, or most of it, was relatively easy. People, thought, emotion, bodies with various parts fulfilling various functions, terra firma upon which all their activities would take place, a structure of celestial bodies out there to hold everything in place with various laws and rules concerning matter and energy, etc. – all this followed quite naturally.

And before He knew it, He realized He was having fun for the first time in eons. Free will, divine intervention, mortality, pleasure and pain, light and dark…oops – here He paused . . .  and He had been having so much fun . . . to think.

A kindly sort, His massive brow furrowed into a deep crease. One thought suddenly began to oppress him. "Would they be able to handle it all?"

He pondered. He vexxed. He pondered and vexxed. And while He was doing this, the Creation itself, only partly finished--and feeling a bit neglected--began to shake and shudder.

 Oh oh.

Sensing this new development, He pulled himself out of His lugubrious reverie, and as quickly as possible got back tending to the main business at hand.

But it was too late. Something untoward, unanticipated, and definitely not in the original plan, had happened. Worse, He wasn't quite sure what it was.

Well, He would find out soon enough.

Anyway, He resolved to just go ahead with it all. His creations would figure out some way through whatever muddles life got them into. And for Him, whatever else happened, things would be a lot more interesting.

So the world got created.

Since this is not an epistemological or ontological tale, the specifics of how this actually occurred in any sort of mythological or historical detail may be left to the reader's preference.

But somewhat shortly thereafter, perhaps a month or two, perhaps a bit sooner or later, something entirely unanticipated by our Creator happened. A gigantic storm of awesome proportions hit the poor fledgling humans square in the heart of their budding village, killing most of them and destroying almost everything that they had built so far. Needless to say, they were devastated, and the Creator wasn't at all happy either, particularly considering that had not been part of the plan at all.

He stopped to consider. How had that sort of development crept in? Then he realized. It must've been during those few moments his focus and concentration had wavered while he was wondering whether His creatures were going to be able to handle His creation.

And unfortunately, hurricanes proved to be only part of it. Over the next however many years, He, and they, came to see there were also earthquakes, tsunamis, and this, that, and the other thing – now all bunched together under the term "natural disasters" or, to His eternal embarrassment, "Acts of God."

And that, dear reader, is but one plausible explanation of the origin of hurricanes.

(@ Lee Strauss, 2019)